Cast Out, Reel In

Just after graduating from high school in 2006 I went through one of the hardest times of my life. I got attached to a girl. Then I had to let her go because we both knew it wasn't the right time... but I didn't want to let go. I let myself get so attached that I thought it was impossible to let go. It has taken some time to learn from that mistake, and I have learned that there is a time and a season to all things. If a rose is picked not bloomed, it will most likely never bloom. Because I love expressing myself in writing, this is the poem that was formed while I was caught up in the emotion of this struggle.

Cast out, reel in. Catch, and now begin.

I caught something. I don’t know what it was.

I held onto it, just to see what it’d do.

It grew.

All the time wondering, wishing,

                            Wanting, waiting.

It was all a blur.

                             In my hand I held so pure.

Green was its color.

                                 What to do with, I did not know.

Words I knew not how to say.

All the things I’d ever done,

When it ended, it begun;

For when I grabbed on – so gently; and painfully – it slipped away.

I held on, I did, thinking it was still there.

Only it was not. Only thin air.

The rain it burned.

The fire it churned.

All that’s left is the scar created.

Something not intended but something meant to be.

Something I thought could never happen

To someone like me.

Holding on I am? Yes – for my hand is stuck –

                               To the feeling- to the pain,

The pain of this life.

The pain that’s meant to live.

My hand is frozen. So cold, so hard.

Life has a cold weather to give.

What’s held onto and gone,

Without rhythm, without time;

What’s left broken without song,

Is without music, without rhyme.

I find myself thinking, wondering,

                            Wishing, waiting,

Thinking of what there is to be.

Wondering, for why is this done to me?

Waiting for someone to hold my hand.

Someone, something to fill this pain inside.

Someone to walk into my land.

Emptiness is all that’s left now.

I’m tired of searching for something that fills

This hole, this emptiness, this misery that kills.

For I’m looking, but I can’t find,

Not only something, but reason.

No. It’s impossible to find.

The words echoed in my mind.

Like a poison it burns.

         Green is the color it has

Sweet misery is the name she’s earned.

              Green is the color she has.

Still in me she is.

                 And forever she will be.

For letting go of this love I’ve found –

                 This love grown on me –

Is impossible, it’s not worth it.

            It’s not worth it to me.

What I caught, what I see is

All that’s meant to be.

I held on just to see what it’d do;

It grew, it grew… on me.

I am now so very sure

               That the time, the reason,

                 The thoughts, the feelings,

I held so pure,

Are there with reason;

Are there for sure.

Forest, Rain, River, Pain,

Mountain, Thunder, Misery, Gain.

Life leads somewhere up above the trees.

What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.

Time must always last longer.

What I hold, what life needs,

This misery,                  This thunder,

                                         This rain,                        This pain,

Everything happens for a reason;

                     It’s mystery we feed,

Looking for reason, that’s what we people need.

So precious, so pure,

             It hurts to cure.

I hold onto this misery, this life,

                            This pain, this history,

Because letting go would be,

                          Nothing but catastrophe.

No pain, No gain is what I always say.

It’s the way the Lord would have it;

                           Truly the only way;

The way to success; the way to sight.

The way to Eternity; the way to light.

Optimism and Positivity

These are two poems that fit really well together that I just felt like posting up today. I don't know when they were written or who wrote them, but I've had them for almost two years now. They both have really good principals that have helped me understand that every opposition we go through is for a reason and that staying optimistic is the key to success.

In all the times that seem so hard,

When tears cry out inside,

You must explore new ways to live,

Reverse depression's tide.

When all of your solutions

Stay away; remain unknown,

And you are isolated

In your heart and feel alone,

Remember that the world

Is full of others just like you,

And you can reach beyond the darkness.

Change your point of view.

Everyone has moments

When their problems seem too much.

Everyone has joys that seem

Elusive, out of touch,

But when it all seems very bleak,

And hope has all but gone,

Remember, time will heal your heavy thoughts,

If you'll hang on.

* * *

If you think you're beaten, you are.

If you think you dare not, you don't.

If you'd like to win, but think you can't,

It's almost certain you won't.

If you think you'll lose, you've lost,

For out of the world we find

Success begins with a fellow's will.

It's all in the state of mind.

If you think you're out classed, you are.

You've got to think high to rise.

You've got to be sure of yourself before

You can ever win a prize.

Life's battles don't always go

To the stronger or fitter man,

But sooner or later the man who wins

Is the man who believes he can.

Collection of words I enjoy

* No pain, no gain
* Mankind has always feared what he doesn't understand. -Magneto
* Through goals and plans our hopes are transformed into action. -Anonymous
* Пусть сташны, тяготы борбы,
Пусть муки ждут меня в тиши,
Я властелин моей судьбы,
Я капитан своей души.  -William Ernest Henrey              
* It matters not how straight the gate,
How charged with punishment the scroll.
I'm the master of my fate,
I'm the captain of my soul.   -William Ernest Henrey
* To understand the meaning of death, we must also know the purpose of life. -Anonymous
* Trials are only blessings in disguise.
* Faith that moves mountains always carries a pick axe.
* Character is the ability to carry out a worthy decision after the emotion of making the decision is past. -Gordon B. Hinckly
* It is better to have a fence at the cliff than an ambulance below. -Anonymous
* When life gets too hard to stand, then kneel. -Anonymous
* We must always have an attitude of gratitude
* The hardest battles bring the sweetest victories. -Anonymous
* Life is like swimming upstream.
* Complaining is wanting something, but not wanting to do anything about it.
* Exercise is never easier, we just become stronger. -Ralf Wald Emerson
* I would rather prepare for something and it not happen than not prepare and find out I should have. -John Johansen.
* When an optimistic man finds a worm in an apple, he goes fishing. -Anonymous
* There are only two people in the end; those who say to God, 'Thy will be done' and those to whome God says, 'thy will be done.' -C.S. Lewis
*The power satan has is the power we give him. -Anonymous
* Hell truly is when the man you are comes face to face with the man you could have become. -Anonymous
* Don't lose faith in the things you do know because of the things you don't know. -Anonymous
* The past is behind. Learn from in.
The future is ahead. Prepare for it.
The present is now. Live in it. -Thomas S. Monson
*We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, therefore, is not an act, but a habit. -Aristotle 
*Once, a perfect man was found guilty at an imperfect trial so that imperfect men could be found innocent at the perfect trial. -Anonymous
* We can edit the future, not the past. -Anonymous
* Everyone want to be understood
* We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, therefore, is not an act, but a habit. -Aristotle
* You can either complain that the roses have thorns, or thank God that the thorns have roses. -Anonymous
* Why be normal when you can be yourself?
* The Lord blesses you with strength to fix what you can fix;
Patience for what you can't fix;
And wisdom to know the difference. -Anonymous
* Hope is the light within us that pierces the darkness of doubt. -Anonymous
* Every cloud has its rain,
Every rose has its thorn,
Every burden has its pain,
Every life must be torn.
* Reason existing is the cause for mystery searching.
* Doubt is wind without motion.
* Pain burns, misery kills, life hurts, time heals.
* For all of life is like a race,
With ups and downs and all,
And all you have to do to win,
Is rise each time you fall. -D.H. Groberg
*God gave us memories so we can have June roses in the Decembers of our lives. -Anonymous
*Freedom requires religion just as religion requires freedom... freedom and religion endure together, or perish alone. -Mitt Romney
* Salvation is not a cheap expeience. -Jeffery R. Holland
* Meekness is not weakness. It is the badge of Christian courage. -Robert D. Hales
* Keep thinking about Him, praying to Him, and reading about Him and your life will keep its true meaning... returning to Him. 
* It's our choice to make adversity stumbling blocks or stepping stones.
* The pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity.
The optomist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. -Anonymous
* Nobody could every go into any of the deepest pits of sorrow where Christ hasn't already been.
* Nothing is more consistent than change. -Thomas S. Monson
* You cannot be yourself while trying to be someone else. -Thomas S. Monson
* Always seek to understand before you're  understood.
*"Come to the edge," He said.
"No. We'll fall."
"Come to the edge," He said.
"No. We'll fall."
"Come to the edge!"
So they went.
He pushed them...
And they flew.  -A french poet
*The hardest battles bring the sweetest victories.

Yablek

On the ninth day of the first month in the year of nineteen hundred eighty eight, Yablek was born. Yablek grew up in a region called Krof Nacirema in the Plains of Hatua in the land of Greendom. Krof Nacirema is located near the north part of the Plains of Hatuaa. It is a very calm place next to a lake and surrounded by mountains. The weather there tends to change very often. The creatures of Hatua have a saying: If you don't like the weather, wait five minutes.

Yablek, the little wolf, was quite the ferocious monster growing up. Teeth were bared often, sometimes for reasons he didn't quite understand. Yablek had a hard time controlling his anger as a little wolf. He would rip up trees, terrorize rabbits before eating them, and push other wolves his age around. He was born into a family with many challenges, so he didn't really know how to handle things that well at times, especially when his dad had to leave to another land... not knowing when he'd come back. Yablek has two younger brothers, Esach and Relyc.

He approached the monster with sword in hand and ready to go. The warrior knew what he faced and knew it would be a long battle, but he knew he would win. They fought, and they fought. Day after day they slashed and tore at each other. The warrior slashed the beasts' throat and the warrior took a blow to the face. This went on for what seemed like years, but an amazing thing happened. The monster started to shrink as the warrior grew. Slashes and blows were easily dealt with for the warrior. One more quick blow, KAPOW, and the monster was gone forever.

As Yablek grew so did his strength. He learned that his anger needed to be taken care of. So eventually he tamed that wild beast lurking inside of him and took control. The beast was destroyed and has never been seen since. No longer did trees have to suffer his wrath. His food would be clean when killed and not terrorized.

Come here my fellow. Come follow me. I will show you the way. These are the words the traveler heard. The Guild was there, on the path, but the traveler didn't know how to get there. He knew he needed to climb the slope leading to the path, but didn't know if he had enough strength to get there. Eventually his friends and family along with his Guide kept urging him back and kept telling him to drop the heavy load he was carrying and get up there. So the traveler decided to start his journey to the path leading to somewhere bright and glorious. After many months of hard work and effort he made it to the path. His friends welcomed him with open arms and urged him to follow the Guide leading the way. So on he went, following the Almighty Guide to his true destination.

Yablek learned to be more charitable to others by giving and sharing. His spirituality grew more as well the more he learned about God and His characteristics. The more he participated in spiritual, uplifting activities, the more his spirit grew. Yablek started to feel a sensation... or you might call it an essence that he had never truly felt. This feeling brought him great joy and peace as he strove to always have this essence with him wherever he went. Yablek continued to embark in service to others as he learned of new ways to help and uplift his fellow beings.

"Where did you go? I can't find you..."
"I'm down here. I fell... I can't get back up. Will you help me?"
"Of course I will. There is never a time I won't help you. I am always here when you fall to lift you back up."

Yablek has never been perfect. He had his many times of trial, as everyone in every land does. There isn't a soul out there who hasn't fallen at least once and needed someone to help them back up. Yablek, even though trips and stumbles came, he always endured. He made a commitment to himself that he will never give up, no matter what.

A dragon flies free in the sky,

Wandering and searching for food to eat,

With determination does he fly

Until he finds some gazelle meat.

With fire he scorches the lonely deer,

Sorry for having to kill,

But grateful God put this animal here,

He feasts on his meal.

Watching nearby, some fifty feet,

Lie dragon slayers, come to compete.

"We'll slay this deadly beast," they say,

"For surely he has got to pay."

"For what?" I ask myself, "Why?"

What did he ever do to deserve

This torture like fire from the sky?

What purpose does it serve?

"He destroyed our houses," they reply,

"Also our people did he killed!" they cry.

And so they have their masterful plan,

To kill the beast and live like a free man.

What they forget to recall, the people, they do,

Is the time when they were the dragon.

They hunted and slayed every friend of the dragon,

His family and children they slayed too.

The people and houses that got burnt in the flames,

Was to rescue his family they had taken.

It wasn't for vengeance or to blame,

The people and their thoughts were mistaken.

So onward they march in attempt to destroy

The dragon they see as their foe.

He wits as he eats and says with a sigh,
"oh, the people, they never will know."

"Don't they see the enemy's inside?

Not here in these plains.

They need to throw their pride to the side

And stop playing these games."

But of course they can't stop what they're doing,

Because their hearts are so blind to seeing.

They strike and slash and bysodoing,

Have torn apart his left wing.

That was it. He had enough.

He burnt them all to dust.

All it took was one big puff.

He only kills if he must.

They never stop. They just keep coming.

They want that dragon dead.

The dragon says to them one thing,

This is what he's always said,

"Come if they must. Come if they may,

But this, my motto you stir up:

You can slash and tear my body away,

I will never, ever give up!"

And so Yablek keeps on going, putting up the fight against the evil that surrounds him every day. The world he lives in is full of tricks and follies that the master of evil uses to bring him down. But he will fight, and he will win, no matter what wounds are inflicted. No matter what pains or injuries are poured into Yablek's cup. He will never, ever give up.

Introduction

This is my story. It is called "The Legends of Greendom". Greendom is a land where many magical creatures reside and go about daily life seeking after what we all know as the human aspiration; happiness. Greendom is my world. You are about to walk into a mysterious land where many stories and fairy tales will be told. I hope you're ready...